weneedawife

Posts Tagged ‘God’

I can’t hear you!

In Uncategorized on November 13, 2011 at 9:33 pm

I was thinking about teenagers the other day and how I really want to take my hand, put it on their heads and transfer “all” my wisdom so they avoid making the same mistakes I did.

I know this won’t happen….unfortunately…

You have heard of hindsight, right?  The definition of hindsight according to dictionary.com is –

the ability to understand, after something has happened, what should have been done or what caused the event

This is very beneficial EXCEPT it is a little too late!!

Wouldn’t it be great if we could just avoid life’s pitfalls?  Have hindsight before making choices…..ahhhhh, how wonderful!!!

Avoid debt, chose a partner wisely, choose a career that really fits us, just make really good decisions?

Isn’t that what we want all the teenagers to do…make really great decisions?  Learn from our mistakes?

But are we really good examples?

I mean….aren’t there red flags we are getting ready to fall in to a pit?

Red flags that tell us our budget it out of control?  Red flags to warn us that maybe this friend isn’t good for us?  Red flags to tell us that the knight in shining armor is just a dud in sparkly clothes?

So, if we, the mature, experienced adults can not avoid these pitfalls, how can we expect teenagers to?

I have had to dig myself out of many pits.  Yes, the red warning flags were there but did I pay attention?  No….I just kept meandering on my path, fell in to a pit and then spent time digging myself out of something I could have easily avoided.

If someone had come to me and said….”If you keep walking down that path, you are going to fall in to a pit that will take you a lot of time and effort to get out of.”  Would I have listened?

Probably not.

How then, do we help teenagers, friends and family avoid pitfalls?  How can we warn them?

Or can we?

Are there some things that just come with age?  With experience?

Is it the way the message is delivered?  Is it a timing thing?  How do we distinguish between those that are open to a warning and those that aren’t?  Is it our responsibility to still say something even though they have their hands over their ears screaming, “I can’t hear you.”?

I don’t know, this thought started out about teenagers but really ended up being about all people.  No one is perfect and no one makes the right choices/decisions all the time but….is there a way to help tip the scales?

A lady I worked with told me her story….She just wasn’t sure the man she was engaged to was really the one God had intended for her.  She asked God to direct her path, she asked Him to have her fiance say a very specific sentence if he was not the man for her.

Well, the next time she saw her fiance, he said the EXACT sentence….

Did she break up with her fiance?  Unfortunately….no.  She had a miserable marriage and her kids suffered even after the divorce.

I think about her often and how she had this big, bright neon sign flashing NO in front of her face and she still ignored it.

I am so sure that God has been that direct with me and I have also ignored the signs.  Other people may have seen the signs for me, but, I was oblivious.

So, back to my original questions….how do we help people “see” the neon signs?  How do we help them dig out of the pits or, avoid them all together?  Is there a system?  A way to help?  Do we have a responsibility to say something?

Appreciate any responses.  A discussion about this is also going on here.

Prayers and Peace,

Lisa

http://www.thelisaeffect.com

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She Speaks in Thoughts, Words and Actions

In Uncategorized on March 11, 2011 at 2:52 am
Lipstick

Image via Wikipedia

I wondered if it might be appropriate to use this blog to post my request for a scholarship to She Speaks, a conference held in North Carolina, which I have wanted to attend for several years. For more information see Lysa Terkeurst

Then, I realized We Need A Wife is a perfect venue because I write these posts with incredible women who were strangers less than six months ago and who all believe we have  God given talents we were designed to share. Encouragement and support from one another help all of us to reach our dreams and We Need A Wife addresses  specific issues women everywhere face; how do we truly use our gifts effectively, while still being a wife, mother, sister, daughter, grandmother, employee, employer and friend to the people in our lives? It’s difficult enough to be responsible, unselfish and focused in any one of those roles, let alone many.

Comfort

Image by Vocalities via Flickr

Woman have certainly been there; Inventors of multi-tasking,  we have prepared dinner or prepared tomorrow’s presentation while nursing a baby,organized a birthday party or earned a degree while rocking a cradle, kissing a boo-boo or helping with homework. We know our families feelings almost before they experience them and when any one of our family hurts,we hurt. We go the distance even when we think we cannot go another inch.We know how to go from sweats to presentable in less time than it takes  most people to brush their teeth. We mentally compose our grocery lists, sales quotas and sometimes even thoughts to God in the shower, on the freeway or in the wee hours of the night whenever we should be having the rest we couldn’t wait to get all day.

A couple of 14-carat gold wedding rings. Pictu...

Image via Wikipedia

We give but we don’t give up.We have often dealt with broken promises, heavy hearts, unrealistic expectations and incredible odds, realizing the back  burner was where our dreams survived until we would permit them the time, energy and resources we had for everything else.

Nobody insisted we sacrifice so much, but being divinely wired for compassion, gentleness, grace and love, we automatically know what our loved ones need before they ask and we give generously to others quite often before we meet needs of our own. Nobody tells us to feel guilty for pampering ourselves, taking time off  to reconnect with our souls, seizing opportunities to support our girlfriends or even just doing nothing for awhile… but we do. Woman can be envious, jealous and sometimes even catty but we also have a measure of unselfishness that is amazing.

Society makes us feel badly about everything from feeding our family a night of fast food to missing the memo on the latest styles. We are looked down on by some if we are working mothers and by others if we don’t contribute to meet the needs of our families. Women are criticized for marrying too young or chastised for waiting to long to settle down. We know what it is like to hit our heads on the bunk bed sleeping next to a frightened or sick child as well as the infamous glass ceiling when being female did not meet a company’s image. Sometimes it seems  we are expected to please everyone but barely make anyone happy. The world often puts us in  spiritual battles with ourselves.

9/365

Image by CR Artist via Flickr

We often forget the image we were made in; forget who loves us unconditionally regardless of the mistakes we make, the goals we don’t always meet or the baggage we carry. We know what we do but forget who and often whose we are.

She Speaks is an opportunity to share my message and encourage others to do the same, because women connect with other women easily, as though we are born into a sisterhood regardless of our circumstances and this sisterhood identifies, remembers and knows we have most definitely been one another’s place. We have stories to share and dreams to achieve and a creator who believes in us more than we often believe in ourselves.

Working Mom (170/365)

Image by Wondermonkey2k via Flickr

While I would love to have the scholarship, I also know that another woman would as well and there are only 2 being given, but  if I am fortunate enough to get a scholarship to  go, I will also pay half the tuition($300) for another woman who wants to attend because then maybe an additional woman who might not be able to afford the entire amount can also have an opportunity. We can do more together than any of us can do separately, because, well, because, we are givers to others, divinely wired to be generous whether with hands to hold, shoulders to cry on, hugs to comfort or words to offer support.We have our weaknesses but together we have unbelievable strength!

Do you feel like somedays you really just need a wife? Maybe you just need to know you are in good company.

Helping Grandmother Walk

Image by Rosie O'Beirne via Flickr

Do you want to take your thoughts and words and put them into action as well? Do you have a message the world needs to hear? Check out She Speaks Conference

I so hope I will be there to meet you!